Tuesday, June 13, 2006

A friend once told me that I lack in personality flaws. Through the last couple days I have felt quite the contrary. I am not sure of the cause of this sudden self examination, but it makes me wonder-- is it getting worse or am I just becoming more sensitive? I have always had a low tolerance level, but when did I become intolerant of myself?

For starters, I dislike when I see nothing wrong with an idea, or I have an opinion of my own, but then I am persuading by someone else to think otherwise. Then when I voice my new opinion, it turns out to be wrong, or the person I am arguing with has a better argument, but his argument is supporting what I originally believed. Recently, I initially thought a situation was a really good idea, but was then persuaded differently. I voiced my new opinion, and I think I was too easily persuaded for selfish reasons. I now feel like somewhat of an ass. This brings me to my next flaw.

I have a tendency to be selfish, particularly in friendships. Sometimes I just don't want to share my friends. Which brings me to maybe the largest issue.

Jealousy. I try so hard not to be jealous, but I just don't know how to turn it off. I don't want to be jealous. Maybe if I keep saying that over and over again it will come true.

In general, it is my belief that I am simply over sensitive. I need to lighten up, take a breathe of fresh air, slow things down, take things less seriously. I am too sensitive, especially when it comes to certain people. I focus too much on certain people's opinions, I over analyze what they say to the point of insanity.

Okay-- here comes the hard part: change. Think I can do it? Oh come on, have a little faith.

Virginia Faith at 11:43 PM

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{xoxo}

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